On the 50th anniversary of the assassination of John F. Kennedy, Bill Maher Friday night paid tribute to the nation’s 35th President in “New Rules” by comparing him to Ronald Reagan. It was an endearing tribute that, as is the “Real Time” host’s way, mocked the conservative Republican.
“We have Kennedy, you have Reagan. We have marijuana, you have
Metamucil. We want gays in the military, you want them in the airport
restroom,” Maher quipped.
Asking, “can we on this day at least agree that Kennedy was cooler?,”
Maher noted, “our liberal icon was a smart sexy war hero who said he
wanted to go to the Moon. Yours was an old fuddy-duddy who tried to rock
denim.”
“Our guy was Don Draper. Yours was Rooster Cogburn. And don’t tell me
Reagan had Hollywood glamour. He wasn’t a star, and in 1980 he was 30
years past his prime, which was never much.”
Maher then went on a long trip down the memory lane of Reagan’s time in office, focusing on just how ugly fashion then was.
“But one reason we looked uglier in the ’80s is cuz we were uglier.
It was when the Baby Boomers, the generation that was supposed to be
different, just gave up and sold out completely. Kennedy’s time was the
time of, ‘Ask not what your country can do for you.’ Reagan’s was the
time of, ‘Greed is good.’
“JFK was far from perfect, but he was a true wit and a sex machine,
and he knew how to wear a pair of shades. Reagan was an amiable square
in a cowboy hat who had sex with a woman he called ‘Mommy.’
“Kennedy was James Bond. Reagan was Matlock. Love him or hate him, we
win. Republicans can call Reagan ‘their Kennedy’ all they want, but
it’s like calling Miller High Life ‘the champagne of beers.’ It’s why
calling some ‘your Kennedy’ will never really cut it, because our
Kennedy… is Kennedy.”
Watch, enjoy, and may JFK rest in peace.
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