Rick Perry Looks Like an Absolute Fool After Net Neutrality Comments Go Terribly Wrong

Have you ever been in a discussion with someone who was trying to sound intelligent, or like they knew what they were talking about, but it was glaringly obvious that they had no clue what they were saying? The result is usually some incoherent babble that sometimes leaves you unable to respond because you really have no idea what the heck they just said – because it didn’t make any sense.

Ladies and gentlemen I introduce you to Rick Perry’s comments on net neutrality. It’s not every day that someone tries to compare the fight to keep net neutrality with anything from the time period of the Great Depression, because that would make very little sense.

Except that’s exactly what Perry did.

“President Obama’s call to saddle 21st century technology with outdated, unnecessary regulations from the era of the Great Depression is alarming and will stifle innovation and growth,” Perry said.

He’s obviously referring to Obama’s attempt to reclassify the internet as a public utility, so that corporations can’t screw over consumers when it comes to internet access. Let’s think about Perry’s comments for a moment. Just because a law (that’s proven to be successful by the way) is from the 30′s, does that mean it’s suddenly invalid and worthless?

By Perry’s standards of “outdated,” couldn’t we then say our entire Constitution is outdated? After all, it was written in the late-1700′s. You’re telling me the quartering of soldiers during a time of war is a big issue in the 21st century? That’s what our Third Amendment addresses.

But what infuriates me most is how Perry, and others who think like he does, continue to perpetuate this ridiculous idea that the internet as we have known it since its inception has somehow been “stifling toward growth.” What the hell are these idiots even talking about? Net neutrality is about keeping the internet exactly how it’s been since it went mainstream. What ending net neutrality does is it gives the right for internet service providers to determine what sites are given access to what speeds based on who pays the ransoms they’ll demand for better service.

Students Embarrass Rick Perry With Explicit Questions About Gay Sex During College Visit

“In 2002, you supported Texas’s anti-sodomy law. Do you dislike bootysex because the peeny goes in where the poopy comes out?” was just one of the many questions Rick Perry was asked while speaking at Dartmouth College over the weekend.

The Texas governor was there to speak about the results of the midterm elections and, of course, to plug himself for president in 2016.

Prior to his speech, a flyer was circulated among students with proposed questions for the governor. Some of those questions included:

• You once played yourself in the movie Deep in the Heart; would you ever let someone go Deep in Your Fart (cavity)?
• You have fought hard against abstinence plus safe-sex education in favor of a strict abstinence only policy. You have also taken a strong position in opposition to abortion. Is this because you want people to not know what condoms are, and not be able to terminate unwanted pregnancies, so they have to have anal sex?
• I know you have been very strong on all foreign policy issues, including Somali pirates, but what is your stance on butt pirates?
• Does your ideal anti-sodomy law prevent me from playing with my own poop shoot?
• You have recently said that homosexuality tears the fabric of society. If I showed you hard science that anal sex does not tear the fabric of your butt hole, would you change your mind?

According to people in the audience, Governor Perry became visibly uncomfortable and deflected the questions as best he could. When things started getting too out of hand, president of the school’s College Republicans group, Michelle Knesbach, grabbed the microphone and demanded students quit asking such vulgar and inappropriate questions.

Unfortunately, her efforts were in vain, because immediately after that, a student brought up that, so far, Perry has accepted a total of $102 million in campaign contributions during his various political campaigns. “Would you have anal sex for $102 million?” the student asked.

As soon as the speech was over, an embarrassed Perry hurried off the stage.

Knesbach told The Dartmouth she was “horrified” by the questions. “They were phrased in incredibly insulting ways,” she said.

But it wasn’t just student Republicans who were appalled. Some student Democrats, too, thought the questions went too far.

“I think it’s really disappointing that anyone would undermine a serious political event with sexually explicit questions,” Spencer Blair, the president of the College Democrats said. “Neither I nor anyone from College Democrats would ever condone such behavior.”

They might not condone that kind of behavior, but we do.

Embarrassing New Poll Shows Practically Nobody in Texas Wants Rick Perry as President

As a former Texan, I’ve seen the enigma that is current Governor Rick Perry first hand. Trust me when I say that most people don’t like him in this state, and that includes many Republicans. His favorability rating seems to hover anywhere between the low to mid-40′s with the number of people who disapprove of his job performance almost always being higher.

These numbers obviously weren’t helped during his 2012 presidential bid that can only be described as a total embarrassment.

Well, the rumor mill continues to churn pointing to the very real possibility that Perry is contemplating yet another presidential bid.

Something which I’m sure gets comedy writers excited, but it seems very few Texans actually want to see happen.

Recently, Public Policy Polling did a survey where they asked Texans who they’d like to see as the GOP nominee in 2016 — and almost nobody chose Rick Perry.

In what should surprise absolutely no one, Ted Cruz led the field, garnering 32% of the vote. As for the rest of the field, 13% picked Jeb Bush and Chris Christie, 10% chose Rand Paul, 6% favor Bobby Jindal and 5% like Marco Rubio and Paul Ryan.

Three percent chose Rick Perry.

Think about that for a moment. The governor of Louisiana ranks higher among Texans than our own governor.

Hell, Rick Perry ranked so poorly that if the presidential race were between himself and Hillary Clinton—he would lose Texas. 

It just goes to show what an epic embarrassment Rick Perry has been to the state of Texas. The only reason he’s been our longest serving governor is because he’s never really faced a true Republican challenger and Democrats in this state stand almost no chance at winning a state-wide election.

Granted, such strong opposition to the thought of him being the 2016 GOP candidate probably isn’t entirely based on his track record as governor. I’m fairly certain his disastrous run in 2012 plays a significant part. It’s not every day you see a presidential candidate unable to name the three agencies of government he would eliminate if he were president.

The sad part is, I highly doubt these numbers would have any impact on Perry’s decision to run. In his mind, I’m sure he believes he stands a real shot at not only winning the GOP nomination, but actually becoming president.

I hate to break it to Governor Perry (actually, I don’t), but if the people in your state would rather see the Governor of Louisiana as the GOP nominee or would choose a Democrat for president over you—you don’t stand a chance in hell.

Texas Governor Rick Perry Indicted On Felony Charges of Coercion and Abuse of Official Capacity Read more: http://www.towleroad.com/#ixzz3AVdE6h5g

In a move that might complicate Rick Perry's 2016 presidential ambitions, a grand jury in Texas has just indicted the long-time governor on two charges related to his effort last year to force District Attorney Rosemary Lehmberg to resign after her drunken driving arrest.

Lehmberg [pictured], the first woman and first openly gay District Attorney in Travis County, runs the state’s Public Integrity Unit (PIU) which is charged with investigating wrongdoing by state officials. After her arrest and guilty plea for a drunk driving incident in April 2013, Perry called on her to resign and threatened to withhold $7.2 million in state money from the PIU if she refused.

Lehmberg refused and Perry carried through with his veto threat. The two felony charges, abuse of official capacity and coercion of a public official, stem from this.

The AP reports:

Several top aides to the Republican governor appeared before grand jurors in Austin, including his deputy chief of staff, legislative director and general counsel. Perry himself did not testify, though. 

Grand jurors indicted Perry on abuse of official capacity, a first-degree felony with potential punishments of five to 99 years in prison, and coercion of a public servant, a third-degree felony that carries a punishment of two to 10 years. [...] 

"I took into account the fact that we're talking about a governor of a state — and a governor of the state of Texas, which we all love," said Michael McCrum, the San Antonio-based special prosecutor. "Obviously that carries a lot of importance. But when it gets down to it, the law is the law."

The Austin-American Statesman continues:

Lehmberg supporters said Perry’s actions constituted political retribution; Many Republicans have said the Public Integrity Unit has unfairly targeted their party for prosecutions. The Travis County District Attorney’s office has for decades been led by Democrats, including Lehmberg.

As head of the PIU, Lehmberg was credited in 2010 with convicting U.S. House Republican Majority Leader Tom DeLay for money laundering. Had Lehmberg resigned after her arrest and conviction, Perry would have been able to name her replacement, likely a Republican. 

Austin's KXAN adds that an indictment indicates the grand jury believes the state has a strong enough case to send to trial and is not an admission of guilt. McCrum told reporters he plans to meet with Perry's attorneys on Monday.

Thank God!

CNBC Host Rips Rick Perry, Says His Remarks on Gays Are Offensive

CNBC Squawk Box host Joe Kernan ripped Texas Governor Rick Perry for his remarks comparing homosexuality to alcoholism in a segment that aired Monday morning.

Said Kernan:

"In terms of comparing it to alcoholism, that's what got all the play, and i don't -- I have a really high bar for what I would take offense to, but that would exceed the bar for me on being an offensive comment. I don't think gay marriage leads to cirrhosis of the liver or domestic violence or DWIs. I don't see how that's similar."

Perry tried to turn the argument to his feeling that states should have rights to legislate as they please, but Kernan wasn't allowing him to get away:

“But in terms of changing the behavior of someone...you wouldn’t think that someone who’s heterosexual, that you couldn’t change them into a homosexual, or someone who is homosexual, you don’t think that there should be therapy to try to change them into a heterosexual?”

When Perry tries to argue that it's an issue that should be left "to the psychologists and the doctors," Kernan replies:

"The psychologists they've already weighed in. they've dismissed the idea that sexual orientation is a mental disorder and they've told their mental health professionals to avoid telling clients that you can change your sexual orientation..."

Finally, Kernan says:

"It just seems like the Republican Party is going to be forever behind the curve on this issue.”

Perry adds:

"I don't necessarily condone that lifestyle. I don't condemn it either. We're all children of God...The fact is that people will decide where they want to live if Washington will respect the 10th amendment and I think that will make America substantially happier and allow people to decide how they want to live and under what rules and regulations."

Rick Perry: Gays Are Like Alcoholics

At an appearance in San Francisco, yesterday Texas Gov. Rick Perry said he doesn't know if "ex-gay" therapy works. And then he compared homosexuality to alcoholism.

The Texas Republican Party this month adopted a platform supporting access to "reparative therapy" for gays and lesbians, a widely discredited process intended to change sexual orientation. In response to an audience question about it Wednesday night, Perry said he did not know whether the therapy worked. Commonwealth Club interviewer Greg Dalton then asked him whether he believes homosexuality is a disorder. "Whether or not you feel compelled to follow a particular lifestyle or not, you have the ability to decide not to do that," Perry said. "I may have the genetic coding that I'm inclined to be an alcoholic, but I have the desire not to do that, and I look at the homosexual issue the same way." The large crowd gathered at the InterContinental Mark Hopkins hotel on Nob Hill included many Perry supporters. But the comment still drew a murmur of disbelief.

Let's see if he walks this one back.

Rick Perry is Now the Focus of a Criminal Investigation

Rick Perry may be the latest in a long line of Republicans to find himself in serious trouble, following in Chris Christie‘s well-trodden footsteps.

According to The American Statesman, the Governor of Texas has lawyered up with a high-profile Austin defense attorney as accusations that Governor Perry illegally withheld money from the DA’s office gather steam. Perry landed himself in trouble when he attempted to withhold $7.5 million dollars of funding until the Democratic Travis County DA resigned — Perry pushed for her to resign after she was convicted of a DWI, and while the DA said that she wouldn’t be running again, she wouldn’t resign, either.

Perry allegedly withholding the money is illegal; a governor cannot withhold funding to force another elected official to resign. The DWI is a matter between the DA and the people who voted for her, and the actions of Rick Perry throw into question hundreds of criminal investigations.

Both Perry and Christie likely had dreams of running for the presidency in 2016, but these criminal allegations may very well have undone them both.

Rick Perry orders Texas prisons not to follow federal rape prevention law

In a letter to Attorney General Eric Holder last week, Perry explained that Texas could not afford to implement parts of the Prison Rape Elimination Act (PREA), which was signed by President George W. Bush in 2003.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry (R) has told the Department of Justice that he has ordered the Texas Department of Criminal Justice not to abide by federal rules that were designed to prevent prison rapes.

“Washington has taken an opportunity to help address a problem in our prisons and jails, but instead created a counterproductive and unnecessarily cumbersome regulatory mess for the states,” Perry wrote in the letter. “Absent standards that acknowledge the operational realities of our prisons and jails, I will not sign your form (certifying compliance with the act) and I will encourage my fellow governors to follow suit.”

Perry argued that because 40 percent of the correctional officers in male prisons were female, it would be impossible to comply with rules that prevented “cross-gender viewing” of inmates.

The governor also complained that the law “infringes on Texas’ right to establish the state’s own age of criminal responsibility” by mandating that inmates 17 years old and younger be separated from adults. And he said “specific staffing ratios for juvenile detention facilities” were unreasonably high.

“I encourage the administration to change these standards and do so soon,” Perry concluded. “Absent standards that acknowledge the operational realities in our prisons and jails, I will not sign your form and I will encourage my fellow governors to follow suit. In the meantime, Texas will continue the programs it has already implemented to reduce prison rapes.”

The San Antonio Express-News noted that the failure to follow federal law could result in criminal penalties, but federal officials have said Perry would not be charged with a crime. Officials from the Justice Department were expecting to meet with Texas officials to discuss the problem instead.

In a Texas Department of Criminal Justice training video for the Prison Rape Elimination Act that was leaked last year, a prison official explains that “offender on offender, or staff on offender abuse allows predatory offenders to grow strong at our expense. As they become powerful, our strength as a security force declines.”

Rick Perry Turns Petty

Last month, the Pentagon announced it would extend the same benefits heterosexual couples receive, to same-sex couples with a spouse in the armed services. Today was the first day military members could file for benefits, but according to My San Antonio, the Texas National Guard, Texas Air Guard and Texas State Guard refused to accept claims from members in a same-sex marriage.

My SSA said Alicia Butler, married in California in 2009 to an Iraq veteran, was turned away from the Texas Military Forces headquarters in Austin today when she attempted to apply for benefits. Saying the state’s ban on gay marriage would not allow them to recognize the marriages of same-sex couples, they suggested Alicia, who has a five-month old son, drive almost ninety miles to Fort Hood, which is under federal jurisdiction.

“It’s so petty. It’s not like it’s going to stop us from registering or stop us from marrying. It’s a pointed way of saying, ‘We don’t like you,” Alicia remarked.

The commander of the Texas Military Forces, Major General John Nichols, defied the Pentagon order to begin treating same-sex couples in the same manner the Texas National Guard treats heterosexual couples, saying the Texas Constitution prohibited it. The general said he wouldn’t stop gay and lesbian soldiers from collecting equal benefits, but they would have to apply at a federally run base.

Governor Rick Perry’s office backed the Texas mutiny. A spokesman for the governor said the Texas Military Forces was a state agency, and had to follow Texas law.

A survey done today by the Associated Press found at least thirteen states that do not recognize same-sex marriages were accepting requests for identification cards and benefits as ordered by the Pentagon. Besides Texas, only Mississippi is known to have defied the Pentagon directive.

Rick Perry Quietly Asks For $100 Million Obamacare Benefit, Even Though He Opposes It

Rick Perry has vocally opposed 'Obamacare' for years, be it throughout his failed presidential candidacy or simply his three-term stint as the governor of Texas. As recently as this past April, Perry turned down $100 million in federal funding to help expand Texas' Medicaid program--funding which, according to ThinkProgress, could have helped provide basic health benefits to 1.5 million low-income Texans. Now, Perry is in negotiations with the White House to receive $100 million in order to help expand a program called Community First Choice. ThinkProgress reports:

"The Affordable Care Act grants state funding to expand a program called Community First Choice, which aims to improve the community-based medical services available to disabled and elderly Americans. The wildly popular program is administered through Medicaid and could prevent thousands of disabled and older Americans from being uprooted from their homes and into a long-term care facility for their treatments. Approximately 12,000 Texans could take advantage of it in the first year alone."

What's perhaps even more laughable is the fact that Perry's spokespeople insist that, even though the governor is negotiations to accept funds from the program, he still opposes Obamacare. The office released a statement to Politico, in which they claim that Perry has sought to help the poor in Texas long before 'Obamacare' became the law of the land:

“Long before Obamacare was forced on the American people, Texas was implementing policies to provide those with intellectual disabilities more community options to enable them to live more independent lives, at a lower cost to taxpayers. The Texas Health and Human Services Commission will continue to move forward with these policies because they are right for our citizens and our state, regardless of whatever funding schemes may be found in Obamacare.”

Advocates of the Community First Choice program contacted Politico as soon as the story broke, worried that even mentioning the program as having any relation to Obamacare might change Perry's mind.  “I would hate for the CFC to become a political football,” said one advocate of the program. The article then went on to admit that, "with the possible exception of Sens. Marco Rubio (R-Fla.) and Ted Cruz (R-Texas), few other politicians have made as big a stink about Obamacare as Perry has."
Perhaps the governor has softened his stance on the program due to the fact that he does not plan to run for reelection at the end of this term. Or perhaps Perry has finally come to terms with the fact that, ever since the Supreme Court reaffirmed the constitutionality of 'Obamacare', it is going to eventually become the law of the land, and has the potential to actually benefit millions across the country.

Watch Out Slick Rick Perry

OOPS!

Hey Rick Perry! God's calling!

GOP Hypocrisy Example #1,563,872

Just yesterday, Texas Gov. Rick Perry (R) called for a second special session of the Texas Legislature, specifically in the hopes of passing sweeping and legally dubious new restrictions on abortion rights. The Republican governor said such a move is necessary because "Texans value life."

In related news, Perry's administration executed a 52-year-old woman a few hours later.

Rick Perry Signs ‘Merry Christmas’ Bill, Says ‘Religious Freedom Does Not Mean Freedom From Religion’

Texas Governor Rick Perry has just signed the “Merry Christmas” bill, which protects schools from being sued for educating “students about the history of traditional winter celebrations,” and allows “students and district staff to offer traditional greetings regarding the celebrations, including ‘Merry Christmas’; ‘Happy Hanukkah’; and ‘happy holidays.’”

“Surrounded by sleigh bell-ringing Santa Claus impersonators, Gov. Rick Perry on Thursday signed a law protecting Christmas and other holiday celebrations in Texas public schools from legal challenges — but also stressed that freedom of religion is not the same thing as freedom from religion,” the StarTribune reports:

It was a serious tone for an otherwise fun bill-signing and should bolster the governor’s Christian conservative credentials before he travels to Washington for the Faith & Freedom Coalition’s “Road to Majority” conference with the likes of tea party darlings and U.S. Sens. Marco Rubio of Florida, Kentucky’s Rand Paul and fellow Texan Ted Cruz.
Dubbed the “Merry Christmas” bill, the bipartisan measure sailed through the state House and Senate to reach Perry’s desk.
It removes legal risks of saying “Merry Christmas” in schools while also protecting traditional holiday symbols, such as a menorah or nativity scene, as long as more than one religion and a secular symbol are also reflected.
“I realize it’s only June. But it’s a good June and the holidays are coming early this year,” Perry said. “It’s a shame that a bill like this one I’m signing today is even required, but I’m glad that we’re standing up for religious freedom in this state. Religious freedom does not mean freedom from religion.”

But in fact, religious freedom does also mean freedom from religion.

Gov. Rick Perry Betrays U.S. Workers By Vetoing Bipartisan “Buy American” Bill.

It’s official: Texas Republican Gov. Rick Perry has renounced his American citizenship and pledged his unwavering allegiance to the flag of the Multinational Corporations of non-America.

Anybody that has been paying attention has known, for a long time, that Republican politicians share little, if any, allegiance to the United States and its people. Since the “Reagan Revolution”, the speed at which they have gifted unnecessary loopholes, subsidies, and other forms of corporate welfare into multinational corporations that ship American jobs overseas is nothing short of admirable.

Gov. Perry is such a puppet of the multinational corporations that fund his political career, he has actually gone out of his way to veto a bipartisan piece of legislation passed by the Republican-controlled Texas Legislature dubbed the “Buy American” bill.

The legislation, officially known as HB535 which was passed by overwhelming margins of 145-0 in the House and 23-7 in the Senate, was intended to give preference to American-made goods when the large state of Texas is making purchases, given that they are of equal cost and quality to foreign made products.