18 Coming Out Success Stories To Celebrate National Coming Out Day

We wish every coming out was like the stories shared below, filled with relief, acceptance and joy.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t always play out so well. Coming out is not a one-size-fits-all kind of activity, and often closeted folks have to weigh their need to speak truth against how they perceive their loved ones will react.

But to those still in the closet contemplating revealing your truth — there is always light at the end of the tunnel. If you face rejection, fear or anger from those around you — even family members — know that the ones who truly care about you will come around in the end and see you for the person you truly are.

And hopefully, you’ll all just laugh it off immediately like these lucky folks on Whisper:

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Country Star Billy Gilman Comes Out, Says Ty Herndon Inspired Him

Let it be known that November 20 will from here on be known as country music’s official coming out day. Hot on the heels of Nashville superstar Ty Herndon’s public acknowledgment that he’s a happily-partnered gay man, country performer Billy Gilman has been inspired to do the same. Gilman, 26, first garnered attention as the youngest person to score a top 40 country hit (he was 12 at the time) with the single “One Voice,” has followed Herndon’s lead and posted a video online in which he acknowledges he’s a gay man with a partner of five months.

Gilman tells viewers that it was “difficult for me to make this video not because I’m ashamed of being a gay male artist or a gay artist or a gay person. But it’s pretty silly to know that I’m ashamed of doing this knowing that because I’m in an genre and industry that is ashamed of me for being me. That said, I want to say that all of the country artists that literally I grew up with – Keith Urban, Vince, Lee Ann Rhimes and all of these wonderful friends of mine have been nothing but supportive. Not that they knew but they’ve just been such wonderful people.”

With the C&W floodgates now wide open, who do you think will come out next?

Watch Gilman’s video below.

14 year old boy coming out to his sister

This Ex-Marine Father’s Touching Response To His Son’s Coming Out Letter Will Make You Cry

National Coming Out Day is just a few weeks away. One California man has decided to get the celebration going early by sharing his emotional coming out story.

“It is very difficult to accurately describe the terror, trepidation and insecurity that accompanies a ‘coming out’ moment,” Jack Freedman (pictured) writes in a new essay shared on his Facebook page.

Twenty-two years ago this month, Freedman came out to his tough, ex-Marine father in a letter. He’s decided to share the letter now in hopes of inspiring others to do the same.

“What is surprising to me, when I read this letter, 22 years later is that I remember the feelings and the fear almost like it was yesterday,” Freedman writes. “I have finally reached the age that I have been out of the closet longer than I was in. But the fear that accompanies coming out to parents often is built up over years and years. It is incredibly intense.”

“All I could think was, ‘Will everything else about me that my dad is grateful for suddenly be irrelevant once he knows I’m gay?'” he admits. “I told my father to read the letter and said that I would come back in an hour.”

Here’s Freedman’s emotional “coming out” letter in full:

September 1, 1992

Dear Dad,

I’ve tried to write this letter so many times over the last six months (in fact this is the third draft of this one). It seems, however, that every time I do, the words just don’t come out or it’s not the right time for me or it’s not the right time for you… I realize that I no longer have a clue as to when the “right” time would be. Actually, I think I’m just waiting for it to be easy and I know that is not going to happen.

Gay Teen And Mother Come Out To Each Other

Are you ready for this one?

This video is certainly a welcome experience, especially considering some of thehorrific coming out stories we've seen as of late. Though this video isn't new, it's recently making the rounds on the Internet and generating a lot of attention for a very clear reason: after this gay teen comes out to his mother... she comes out to him as well.

"That's very brave of you to tell me that," the boy's mother notes. "Thank you for telling me. It doesn't make me love you any less -- at all. Ok? Your choice is your choice. I accept you however way you are. You're still my boy... Honey, I'm okay with it. Okay? I am okay with it. Can I tell you something too? As you've been so open with me, I'll tell you a secret too... I've had a girlfriend."

Check out the video to hear the rest of the exchange.

Courage, character and clarity in young Texan's coming out story

James Alexander

Twenty year-old James Alexander, a student at the University of Houston, has shared his coming out story in a moving and compelling essay for LGBTQNation.

It's really a must read for folks who realize the depth of our fears and concerns when figuring out how and when to come out.

James beautifully chronicles the moment he came out on Facebook to his high school friends and the support he received; and the long and painful journey he and his parents shared in accepting his sexuality.

Just an excerpt from James' story:

My first week in community college I made several friends and kept contact with those I had made at the University as well. I went to class, talked with friends, and then I’d go home to study.

My second week of school I decided to join the LGBT alliance to meet new people who may have been in the same position as me. The club became a haven for me. I felt safe and validated there, but at home things started to get increasingly worse. My father, mother and brother-in-law made several homophobic remarks on a regular basis that ate away at my self-esteem which became apparent after several weeks.

I kept doing the same routine: school, study, sleep, repeat. Sleep became increasingly cumbersome as my mental health started to deteriorate. I started having dreams where I’d speak, but not be heard. Over many of this reoccurring dream I would speak to the crowds of people around me in an ever increasing volume and received no response.

Then, my dreams started to get violent. I remember waking up from a very graphic and brutal nightmare and then knew I had two choices: come out, or sit by while my mental health plummeted. I chose to come out.

Like James, I grew up in conservative Texas. I understand much of the mindset and opinions that are so pervasive throughout the state's culture.

But, I was lucky to have a father who supported my dream of being an actor, let me attend the best school I could get into (even if it was across the country), and when I did finally address my sexuality - he barely blinked.

With all the progress the LGBT community has made in recent years, I think we may have made a mental leap that misses the reality that there are still difficult coming out stories. Everyone doesn't get a hug and an ice cream cone in these huge life moments.

For some - like James - coming out is a slow, but forward process. For others, like Daniel Pierce in Georgia, whose coming out went viral when a video of the event documented verbal and physical abuse, it's still a very emotionally raw life event. 

The good news is we have strong, courageous men like James and Daniel, who had the clarity of heart to not only stand up for themselves, but share their stories. And in their stories, other young people will find strength and self-confidence.

I urge you to read James' essay at LGBTQNation.

And remember National Coming Out Day is October 11th. If you are closeted - at any age - and feel you need to talk to someone, reach out to folks who are always there, like at The Trevor Project. Or hell, email me here if you want to share. 

Thanks to James - one more important journey that shows it does get better.

Not Ready to Love a Gay Child? Then Don't Have Kids

Parents annoy me -- annoy and frustrate me. I know that's an odd statement considering that I am a parent. (And yes, I annoy myself sometimes.) We parents need to do a lot better.

For the past couple of months, I have been answering some questions for The Parents Project, an organization that lets parents of LGBT kids ask questions and get answers. It's a great idea, and I feel honored that they think I might have something wise and helpful to say. A little while ago I was given this question:

My daughter recently told me that she is bisexual, but she hasn't told her father. She is concerned that he will have a poor response, and to be totally honest I am also concerned. I don't want to keep this from him, and I certainly don't want her to have to keep it a secret in our home, but I am not at all sure how to handle the situation. Do you have any advice?

I thought about this question for a few days, but in the end I gave up. Every response I could think of wasn't the least bit wise or helpful -- things like:

"Why did you marry this man with whom you do not share core beliefs?"

"Why did you marry a man you knew might not love and support your children?"

"Why haven't you divorced this guy already?"

See? Not helpful. And it's because I cannot fathom being married to and choosing to procreate with someone I know might not love my children. That's just ridiculous. Why would anyone do that?

Before, I have likened being gay to being left-handed. Anyone can have a left-handed kid. It's something that is different from the majority of people, but it doesn't make it wrong. It doesn't have anything do with what kind of person someone is. It's just an another attribute that makes up who they are. Once upon a time, people thought being left-handed was an awful, horrible thing to be. Kids were punished for being left-handed and were often swatted by nuns, if the stories my father tells are true. But these days nobody cares. We got over our collective selves and let the left-handers be.